While it is sometimes possible to go for days without the bad effects of BIID manifesting themselves too greatly (I have to admit that they are always there no matter what but I don't think you can expect them to go away when it's your eyesight that is the problem) there is always the possibility that at some point you're going to have a bad day or for some other reason need a reprieve from the problem, even if it's only temporary.
To this end I have been looking into a number of solutions that would help me out and I have identified three possibilites, each with their own advantages and disadvantages. I'll go through each of them in turn.
The first solution is for me to use a blindfold of some kind to block out my vision. This is a simple and effective solution that rids me of my problem quickly and efficiently. It's also a reasonably cheap method, which is a plus. I've refined this solution somewhat by using a sleep mask I picked up from my local supermarket. This is better than a standard blindfold in that I don't have a load of fabric tied around my head when I use it and I'm sure everyone would agree that is a definite bonus. Of course this solution can't be used outdoors so if you opt for the blindfold option you're still faced with all the problems of BIID whenever you step outside.
The second option helps with this somewhat. It's a modification of the blindfold solution that replaces the blindfold or sleep mask with something that is less likely to lead to awkward situations while outdoors. The solution is to buy a pair of sunglasses (for me they have to cover as much vision as possible because my self image is total visal field blindness, not partial blindness) and paint the insides of the lenses black (or whatever colour the lenses are if they're not standard dark lenses).
By painting the insides you end up with sunglasses you can't see out of but which, for most intents and purposes, still look like sunglasses. You really need very dark lenses (or preferably mirrored lenses) for this to work properly otherwise anyone talking to you or up close to you will notice they can't see your eyes through the sunglasses as they'd normally expect to be able to. So unless you're willing/able to get sunglasses you can successfully modify, this option isn't a good one either.
The third option is, in my opinion, probably the best but it's also the most expensive. There are outlets, particularly on the Internet, where you can buy specialist contact lenses and some of these are "no vision" lenses, like the ones used for the Daredevil film. They cut out your vision by having opaque colour over the area where your pupil would be, effectively blinding the wearer for the duration they are worn. These lenses are expensive however, so if you go for this option you've got to expect a decent initial outlay.
Of course being contact lenses they also require efficient care and upkeep or they'll get damaged. You've also got to be sure to clean them properly or they get covered in bacteria that can damage your eyes. I make this note because blinding you isn't the only damage bacteria can do to the eyes and while blindness would be a nice side-effect in this case, the other problems aren't welcome!
3 comments:
With regard to your first paragraph, I must say that I can relate all too well. In my case, the BIID affects my arms, which means that it affects *everything* I do - I daresay as much as eyesight does.
As for specific solutions to the problem, I have yet to find one that would be effective for me that could be used in public. Aside from the ability to use my arms (which could be dealt with by, for example, casting) being a source of frustration, there's also just the weight and bulk of them being present (which is made worse by any attempt to immobilise them).
Sometimes I can still go through whole days without being terribly troubled by BIID. I'm always quite aware of how useful and convenient it is to have arms, and conversely, how inconvenient it would be not to have them, but on most days, I'm just overwhelmed by the psychic overlay that tells me that my body is simply not meant to have them.
"Sometimes I can still go through whole days without being terribly troubled by BIID. I'm always quite aware of how useful and convenient it is to have arms, and conversely, how inconvenient it would be not to have them, but on most days, I'm just overwhelmed by the psychic overlay that tells me that my body is simply not meant to have them."
I think you pretty much summed-up my post in that one paragraph! :)
The days when I'm not troubled by BIID are the nice ones, they're the days when I can just get on and do things without all the mental baggage that goes along with my general existence.
Then there are the bad days, when everything hits home hard and I feel like I'm paying for the good days. They aren't nice at all. :(
Just wanted to say that I also have blindness-variant BIID and personally I find that closing my eyes is the best method for "pretending". I do not like having something on my face, and closing one's eyes is suitable for public use as well.
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